Monday, May 30, 2011


Sorry, Lumosity. You're freaking me out. I never even got into Cranium either. Or Mad-Libs. Some gamer I'm turning out to be... anyone know a good place to play some Smash T.V.? Gotta find that Bolo link again as well. For some reason I really got into that game for the ol' Apple II. Something about the going places and shooting stuff. That does it; I'm off to bed. My eyes are getting bleary.

Facebook->Treasure Madness

Oh, Treasure Madness... what happened to you, man? You used to be cool... Actually, that's not true. But I confess I did pump my share of Visa into it, I'm ashamed to say. Can't remember the last time I played it now. All these things have a bit of a shelf life, apparently. Well, I've taken Farmville and Tetris Madness... Battle about as far as they'll go today, so why not visit the ol' TM stomping grounds? That is, until I got the Flying Ball one too many times. These things are supposed to be easy now! Streamlined even. All anxieties removed. For a while there they even got rid of Jewel Drop and Chestris so players wouldn't suffer the agony of having to use the KEYBOARD, God forbid. All mouse-based games. Gotta like the Memory game, of course. I was kinda hoping I'd get to play Squarenigma, but it never came up. PRobably for the best. Maybe they just scrapped it altogether. Now it's all Maya Gems, yet another variation on Bejeweled. God bless the video game clones, every last one of 'em. Why, I remember way back when I first got Windows 95. Video games came on CD-Roms back then, if you can believe it! They had a Bejeweled clone... oh, wait. No, it was a thing where you'd get sets of three gems that needed to be strategically placed. Also, I played an HP game for a while a long time ago that involved swapping gems, getting some to fall into the right place... no! It's too late. No time to look it up now. It's well past my 2am bedtime as it is. Gotta wrap this puppy up.

7/26/'17, 8:48pm -  ...okay, no pic.  For whatever reason, Firefox really really doesn't want me posting a pic right now.  Better reboot, I guess...

 There we go!  Just a refresh is what the doc ordered.  Well, I'm back on the white stallion again... something like that.  I noticed a glitch, Treasure Madness programmers.  Of course, by 2020 it'll be a moot point, as Flash is going to be officially gone by then.  Sad. :( .  But a certain duo with JcPenney as a client will get by somehow!  That much I know.  You probably can't see the glitch that I see, but who cares anyway.  I believe it's a mask issue, a Flash masking issue.  But really, who wants to go back and tinker with that crap?  SOOO not worth it.

9/8/'17 - Has it been six weeks or so already?  Dayang.  Welp... what was my big insight?  Oh, right.  I finally decided to spend some of those "bucks" you get in the game.  All these games have them now, of course.  And all these games have some kind of upgrade as well.  Several, of course.  Nothing lately connected to hurricane relief.  FarmVille ought to get into that some more again.  Tis the season!  Anyway, I upgraded my "backpack" from 100 to 150.  Now I'm getting inundated with these offers, these "special" offers to buy more stuff, of course.  Funny how these games reflect my situation in life.  In the games and in real life, I'm scrambling around, just trying to hang onto a few thousand dollars.  Like comedian John Witherspoon, I too am a "thousand-aire."  So too in these games.  I guess it's starting to get to me or something...
 9/13/'17 - This says more about me, of course, but every time I see this now, I think it says "Explore wonderful curves on TM."  Why couldn't I play that game instead?  No, I gotta be stuck with this grid bullsh... nonsense.  Oh well.  Better check to see if I've got six health points yet!  It's been five minutes...

12/8/'17 - Whew!  Long day of battling the "dust" from my kidney stone.  That's going to be a sad day when I have to give up chocolate because it turns out the dust was made up mostly of calcium oxalate.  Anyway, Treasure Madness... I dunno man.  Maybe we ain't meant for this love.  I was so close to upgrading my backpack, too, and all.  But here's my message to the programmers and trustees of Treasure Madness... and yes, it's another bug report.  Well, maybe it's just a JavaScript problem.  I'm trying to pick from a list of maps.  But when I go to drop the list down and whatnot... it just kinda freezes!  It tells me that it's loading... but the loading takes, like, a long time.  It used to take five to ten seconds.  Now it doesn't load.  After a couple minutes.  As much as I like waiting, I'm a gamer!  I have no patience!  So I think it might be time for me to get back to the various crushes I once had that involved candy.  And as much as I love playing individual levels of "Soda" over and over, I confess I'll also be glad to finally get past level 678.  Seem to be stuck on that one forever.  And I haven't even played Jelly for a while! 
Ooh, one more bug.  When I pick Treasure Madness from my list of game shortcuts on the right side of the screen, it takes me to a blank white page that says that Facebook thinks it's some kind of prank or a malicious site, so it's not going there.  I mean, I can still use the text-based list, but what can me say?  Me like having two.  Oh well.  More sacrifices.  Okay, I'll leave you guys alone now.

Wednesday, May 25, 2011

Atari emulator - Quasimodo

Okay. NOW I think I'm ready to get back to my homework... after a nap, of course. Apparently, even though absolutely everything in the world is on the web, Google and Yahoo can't find me a list of the things that Quasimodo says... in the Synapse Software 1984 video game. With each progressively HARDER level, Quasi has a new saying. The first is "Time for revenge." The second is... well, let's do it like this

Time for revenge
Not again
Quasi ticked off
Blood will run
Ghost gonna pay

...and it goes from there. Man, those guys that climb the ladders are much tougher than I thought. I don't know how I was ever able to get as far as I did on the old Atari. With mere joysticks no less.
I got it! ...phooey. Not working so far. Must be time for some more Java or something.

Thurs., 26 May 2011 -> 2:23pm... and now, the down key doesn't work. I can climb UP the bell ropes, but not back down. And then, the game freezes on me! I don't remember THAT happening with the Atari! Also, the Ultima games don't work on the emulator here. Probably just as well. So much free time to squander, so few activities to find to do just that.

12/31/'12 - Finally!  Oh, this is going to be a great new year after all.  Just found the piece of paper that I wrote the 16 phrases on, so here they are............


Such violence!  Well, it was the 80s.  Lotta strange things happening.  The offices of Synapse Software were a hotbed of Dionysian indulgence, with programmers doing blow off the backs of supermodels.  Something like that.  I gotta go.

Back to the Battle

Oh, tetris battle... how you toy with my emotions. Only 2 more minutes and I can play again. Gotta let the time abscess fill anew. That takes about eight hours for me now. I'm on the cusp of another level. You TB fans know what that means! A free recharge! Niiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiice... Also, they're having intermittent server trouble, but it might of gotten fixed by now. Who knows these days?

Web: Mini-Putt

God, I love that game. Go ahead! Try it for yourself!

Good Lord... more Tetris Battle

Another ass-whooping in Tetris Battle. I think I'm going to have to buy some of that star-protecting armour. I never thought level 22 would be so tough! Goof Lorf!

Monday, May 23, 2011

Atari emulator - Beer Belly Burt in BREW BIZ

Love that clunky ol' game. Alas, I don't have the time to properly enjoy it anymore. But it does feel kind of weird actually being able to finish the game. The version I have on five inch disk was a corrupted version that didn't have a complete Shipping level. And yet, I would always hope that it was. Now that I've got the complete version, it's somehow anti-climactic. Ain't that always the way?
The nice thing about the Atari emulator is that it lets you save your current state in whatever game you're playing. As usual, like everything in life, it's a good and bad thing. Fortunately for me, I planned ahead and saved a bunch of Brew Biz states. Forgot about that!
So, where does it fit in the big paradigm? Well, it's more of a Donkey Kong than a Pac-Man or Space Invaders. Also, it's apparently not made by the folks who gave us Ollie's Follies and Ghost Chaser... or is it? Kewl! It is! Ollie's Follies by American Eagle! Ghost Chaser says Artworx, but it's Frank Cohen! Of Cohen's Towers fame, no less. But I'm not as familiar with that one. I keep getting hit by a falling flower pot. Some games don't want you to play them.

Sunday, May 22, 2011

Good Lord... Tetris Battle overload

So, am I rich and famous yet? ...oh, right. Not how it works. Well, being somewhat depressed about the fact that I'm not quite done w/school yet... and I've got another deadline for Wednesday, having yet to get re-started... why not spend most of the weekend playing Tetris Battle on my beloved facebook? At least my eyes haven't gone bleary on me yet. That's in the next few hours.

Wednesday, May 18, 2011


And my farm disappears again, after a slew of notices I gotta post... Gotta go to a friend's farm and make it reappear. Again.

The Unified Pac-Man/Space Invaders Theory of the Universe

Welp, it seems that every ambitious person has at least one explanation of the universe and how it works and all that kind of stuff. Many aspire to be Einstein but few do that well. The important thing, of course, is to try. Which is why I'm trying to reduce my own personal universe to as few elements as possible... something like that. With video games, it should be easy. So if you had to pick two games from which all other games seem to spring, Pac-Man and Space Invaders are about it. It seems you're doing one menial task or another in video games: you're either eating or shooting. There's no shooting in Pac-Man; no, you have to burn calories to achieve your goals. There's no eating in Space Invaders, just the endless shooting. Same with Asteroids, Centipede and Millipede. At least in Doom, there's balance. There's plenty of shooting, but you do have to eat food and collect supplies. Damn Vista. Sigh, I miss Doom. I could really shoot some demons right about now. Anyway, with my collection of Atari games there's a giant family tree to construct! Better run...

More Tetris Battle...

Frankly, I dunno who's responsible for it. I thought Atari owned the rights. I know Pajitnov came up with the original Tetris some 20 odd years ago. Makes you wonder who REALLY won the Cold War! Speaking of politics... I hate to get political, but frankly I'm too burned out on politician sex scandals to get worked up about Ahnold Schwarzenegger's illegitimate baby. He's a celebrity! He gets lots of tail, I'm sure... or, at least, many offers of it that he must try to refuse. But you do gotta hand it to Clinton; at least he knew when to pull out! Drumroll... but that's what politics has come down to. David Vitter, John Ensign about to resign, Gov. Sanford, Larry Craig, that guy from Oregon, Goerge H.W. Bush... they're starting to pile up! Anyway, yes, hare of the video game that bit me. But I tried to surprise myself by only playing about four or five rounds instead of maxing out my full power allotment. And I did it! I tell you, though, there's nothing like really getting your ass kicked in Tetris Battle. Oh, if you get knocked out, like, two or three times, no hope of catching up. And sometimes you decide to just fill up the screen yourself! Save the other guy the trouble. Doesn't happen too often to me. I gotta work to win my bouts. Also, I set my map to random for two reasons: 1, because it's more interesting (I just love losing on that Egyptian guy puzzle!) and 2 because it's easier to win. If it's just an empty screen, I don't seem to win at a level higher than 10. Oh well. Okay, that's all I got about that. The cat just came in at 1 in the morning, with his tail really puffed out, but he doesn't seem to have any holes in him, and now he's in my lap. And I got hella homework to do. Ciao!

Tuesday, May 17, 2011

Facebook ---> Tetris Battle

Something a little more modern.
1:45am - Is it not time for some Tetris Battle?
...2:29am - Oh, right! It was. Unfortunately for me, the party's moved elsewhere. Too many desperate TetrisBattle-ians trying to climb that ladder, in the hopes of jumping off it with a golden parachute, I suppose. Oh, you don't want to go against one of them, so desperate for a revenge they'll never satiate they are. I should know: I'm one of 'em! Used to be when I would play it this late at night, an A.I. program would kick in that could play the game against me quickly, but not very well, improperly inflating my status. Guess I'm right where I deserve to be now, at about 23 stars. Brother, losing stars has got me down. They don't know the two thirds of it. But that's how it goes, you know. I'm saving up so I can buy one of those week long tickets so I can really hook myself into the game, ya know? ...I wonder how many calories I burn playing this game? Probably not that many. I'm a tad overweight myself, flirting with 200 pounds again. I know, poor me. Okay, better get my ass off to bed.

Monday, May 16, 2011


I dunno... sometimes I get the feeling that FarmVille's too needy. Welp, better fix it so my English farm's not in a state of carbonite; gotta go...

Atari - Agent U.S.A.

Why, it's my patriotic duty to play this game! I think the creative animation genius behind Dr. Katz had something to do with this game. You play Agent U.S.A., the White Hat Messiah who's come to save the day. It's almost a perfect organic system: you grow crystals to fight the Fuzz Menace, a gentle swipe at television. You need one hundred crystals to destroy the queen bee central Fuzz, and you need crystals to change fuzz people back into normal black hats with legs. Trouble is, the black hats with legs also like the crystals, and they can use them to turn fuzz people back to normal as well. Almost a perfect organic system. But every once in a while you're able to grow crystals unfettered, as long as you keep pushing people onto the trains. I get pretty aggressive that way. What can I say? I'm an alpha male in an omega male body... or I guess I should say, meat bag. That's cutting edge lingo, I'm afraid. Pretty sick. Okay, back to the thesis. Elma Sniddle forever!!

Atari - Pharaoh's Curse

Love that game. Synapse Software's Pharaoh's Curse by the great Steve Coleman, maker of Rainbow Walker and the Atari version of Raid Over Moscow. I don't know why I didn't notice it sooner, but there's an easy endless loop here where you can keep grabbing keys, and inflate your score far above the typical 4000 points... I like to think it's because I respect the game too much, but really, it's because I'm a bit slow. In case you didn't notice. I mean, really, shouldn't a video game blog be exclusively about Playstation 3 and Xbox 360?

Oh great... MORE free time lost

Well, there's no doubt anymore. I just can't wait until my thesis is over and done with. The Video Game Fanatic is open for business.