Monday, September 5, 2016

Atari Emulator -> Matterhorn

While we're waiting for the new Words with Friends challenge to begin... bastards... here's a question for you.  Ever wonder why you're not making it anywhere in life?  Well, first of all, it's probably networking.  You're just not kissing the right ass, probably.  And second, it's all about patience.  And Tigervision's Matterhorn is the kind of patience test that I simply cannot pass.
First of all, take the first level.  Admittedly, I'm the kind of gamer that doesn't like to waste time with the instruction manual, so I just figured out that you can take the vertical white lines and use them as ammo against the laser-shooting birds above.  It's the old fisherman patience test, for one: fish or cut bait?  Do you keep running, or do you stop and shoot at the laser-firing birds?  Well, seeing as how many times they killed my weak ass, I had to blast me some birds for a while.  And, just like the one the Mortals refer to as 'Rimrock Lobster,' I too had to use the Atari emulator's save function just to get ahead.  Oh, the game's just that worth it, people.  And I do appreciate how tough it is for an Atari to do special effects.  When you die, mainly by the bird's laser, the screen shuts like an eyelid, thereby straining the 6502's capabilities.
Second level: it's like that part of Jungle Hunt, or B.C. Quest for Tires to a lesser extent, but without the bouncing boulders.  The birds still come at you, slightly fiercer even.  You're able to climb up tiny outcroppings of rock, but so far it seems to suit no purpose other than wasting time.
Third level: it's like that part of Jungle Hunt, but now there are bouncing boulders, and it's steeper. And no birds, thank God.
Fourth level: ...ah, sweet insanity.  This is what it's all about right here.  The word 'matterhorn' seems to imply mountain climbing, doesn't it?  Well, on levels 4 and up, you lose your ability to jump, probably due to the lack of oxygen at alti(tude) 41.  There's two sides of a chasm that you have to ascend.  The only way across are these teeny cyan platforms that move horizontally across the chasm.  And should you not intimately know the rhythm of these platforms, you fall to your immediate death... you know, mountain climbing.  Also, there's dragons that you have to shoot.  You have horizontally flying bullets for this purpose.
Fifth level: Much like the fourth, but there's a red gem you have to get to.  Your reward?  Back to level one to start all over.  Oh, if only coming down the mountain were so simple.  Would that it twere...

Official Atarimania home for Tigervision's Matterhorn

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